Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Well at least I had a go!!

The 10 rules of making a pumpkin lantern:

Rule 1: always buy your pumpkin well in advance of the 31st - otherwise when you cut the top off you will overcome with the smell of rotting pumpkin flesh!

Rule 2: work out what you are going to cut before you start; having a vague idea is not the best approach

Rule 3: use appropriate cutting tools - a bread carving knife, a screwdriver and serving spoon are not the ideal tools

Rule 4: make sure that you have either
a) purchased a night light candle
b) know where they are stored in your home

Rule 5: do not use a head light as used for walking/reading in bed under the covers - they give off a different type of light and the elastic gets covered in slimy pumpkin (see rule 1)

Rule 6: try not to take photograph too quickly despite batteries running out (see rule 4 - where abouts of house hold batteries), it only causes blurring and disappointment

Rule 7: wash hands before drinking that now cold cup off coffee - the smell together with the slimy fingers will
a) cause you to retch
b) not obtain a true grip on the handle thus cup will slide in a downward fashion spilling now cold coffee onto your jeans and trainers

Rule 8: despite what may inspire you DON'T attempt anything other than a simple jagged mouth, two eyes and a triangle for a nose

Rule 9: when asked why are there pumpkin seeds on kitchen floor and a funny rotting smell do not blame
a) cats
b) the poor quality vegetables in your organic delivery box
c) something you had for lunch

Rule 10: dispose of the 'pumpkin masterpiece' in the appropriate brown bin vowing that next time you will buy a ready made one

Here's the finished one - 25 minutes, 8 needles/pins, 1 cold (spilt) cup of coffee and a whole lot of clearing up!

just in case the question should arise: me looking grumpy

1 comment:

jafabrit said...

lol, we skipped every single rule and bought a plastic one with a light bulb inside! Of course that's coz we don't have little kids anymore :)